You can’t shake hands with a closed fist”. Indira Gandhi
Are you one who keeps a list? Many of us take very careful count of
all that has been lost. With the scrupulous exactitude of resentment,
we tally up every wrong that was done to us, every privilege or
pleasure that we were denied, every hardship or obstacle that blocked
our way. Because we make such an effort to record everything, our
list grows and grows with each passing year. And the longer it gets,
the better we like it. Justifying resentments can be mighty
satisfying.
The problem is that list making keeps us fixated at the point of our
losses. It nails us to the past, forever victimized, forever on the
lookout for more of the same.
Resentment closes the hand to a fist. How can a fist reach out in
friendship or reconciliation? How can a fist receive love or any
other gift? A fist may be fine for clutching a grubby little pencil
and slashing away at a yellowing old score card. But it closes off
too many good things. Nobody ever gave anything to a fist.
Most of the items on our list may be factual. Some may even be
criminal. But what real purpose is served and what price paid by
compiling a catalogue of misery? Wouldn’t it be better to let that
stuff go? Bad enough that those things happened at all; worse yet
that we’re still keeping them alive.
I CAN’T HANG ON TO THE OLD AND REACH OUT FOR THE NEW AT THE SAME TIME.
Taken from the book: Believing in Myself by: Earnie Larsen and Carol
Hegarty
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